sometimes i feel impatient..
my heart saddens..
but then i think about it again..
A Letter For Him...
I am wondering at this very minute if you are thinking of me, if like me, you are wondering what is taking us so long to find each other. Many times I thought I finally found you only to be disillusioned by the fact that my wait has not yet ended. I get up each morning hoping, dreaming, and longing to meet you. I'm thinking of how we will meet, would it be as romantic as the ones I have seen in the movies? Or is it possible that I've already met you but we have yet to realize that we are meant for each other? Sometimes I ask myself if I have ever really known "love". I do not have the answer to that question either but I believe that, more often than not, we will never really know what love is until we find that right person and since I have not found you yet, then maybe I do not really know what love is! You just don't know how I dream of finally knowing what it feels in you arms. Even at this very moment im imagining how you will simply sweep me off my feet! Perhaps I'd be drawn to you by your smile, your eyes, or maybe even how you manage to make me laugh by your silly little ways! I don't really know for sure but im praying that god will help me recognize you when the right time comes. I think of all the pain that I have gone through in the past and how much ive cried ever since I started my search. I just wanted you to know that I find my strength in clinging onto my vision of the beautiful life ahead of me -- the life I shall spend with you. In my mind and in my heart I know that you are worth all the pain and sacrifice. After all, the tears have become a part of my life and I believe that they are slowly washing away my flaws so that I would become perfect, not perfect in its truest sense, but perfect --- for you!
At night I utter a silent prayer and send all my cries to the heavens above thinking that in time they would reach you. And when I feel impatient, I just close my eyes and believe that you are on you way and that you are longing to see me as well. It is funny that when I finally fall asleep, it is still you I think of, for you are always in my dreams. It seems that for now that is the only place where I can hold on to you, long enough to tell you how much I love you. In my dreams you would kiss away my fears and wrap me with your arms of love. And this, all the more, makes me want to wake up and face the new day ahead with the hope that soon enough,, you will no longer be a dream but a reality and once again im assured that you are worth the wait. And when that time comes, everything will fall into its place, just as I had imagined, just as I had thought and dreamed, just as I had believed it would be! By then, I would simply look back and smile at all that I have gone through in spite of the pain and amidst the simple joys of life -- and I would be very thankful because they all led me to you! In the meantime, take care of yourself for me. Hold on to our dream and don't ever think of letting go. Believe in your heart that we will find each other no matter what happens. God has planned the course and it is up to us to follow the directions. Don't worry about getting lost, god saw to it that all the roads, no matter which one you choose to follow, lead to me.